Getting to know Me

Looking Back Word{less} Wednesday


Looking Back

It’s crazy how much changes in a year, and how much you strive to change in a year.  I remember when I entered my thirties, I became all sorts of fearful, I started to think I was getting closer to the end when rather, I think I’ve started getting closer to a fuller happier life.  I’m sure when I join the 40’s club I’ll go back into hypercondriac mode again, but for now I’m learning to appreciate my 30’s.  The picture above was taken on October 1, 2013, the day after my birthday.  I took this picture to send to my best friend to show off my new haircut, I stood barefaced, most probably in halloween socks in my kitchen looking for good light, and snapped it to share miles away.  I’m always looking for good light 🙂

Before and After Haircut Post

Boxing up and moving out

I had NO idea how this year of my life would turn out, all I knew was I wanted to be a better me, a less fearful me.  My life was in limbo at the time, I was not sure if I would spend another birthday in Illinois because there was a job offer on the table for my honey, which of course he took.  That was my last birthday in that home.  My home I made ours for 7 years, the one I bitch and complained that it was too small and needed this and that, I miss it sometimes.  In a year’s time my life changed immensely, yet stayed the same.  My solids, my rocks, my every things made every thing okay.  The move to South Carolina was a HUGE element in our lives, we were leaving our home, Illinois (all my kids really ever knew).  The move came quick and time has just been zooming since.  I’ve made many personal accomplishments I’m proud of this year.  I’ve also: moved on, reached out, cried, screamed, reacted, remained silent,  loved, learned, and lived….  (remaining silent can be a positive sometimes)

Sunshine South Carolina

I’ve given myself this year to grow.  I wouldn’t say I’m a grown up 😉  I’m still a kid because one of the biggest thing I will remember from this year of my life….

Singing in the rain
 My FIRST visit to Disney World!


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© 2014, Dean @Mrs. AOK, A Work In Progress. All rights reserved.

26 thoughts on “Looking Back Word{less} Wednesday”

  1. Here I am, making such a big deal over moving a town over from where I lived the last 7 years, and you moved to a whole other region of the country! I didn’t realize that all happened in this past year. It sounds like it was a big year for you and your family. Happy birthday, friend, and here’s to another great year!

    1. Thanks, Bev! :::virtual hug:::
      I don’t think you made a big deal, and moving is a big deal no matter where you go. It’s a change in your life, although change is good, it’s different, and different can be scary… but in the end, it’s really not. <<---- Did I write that? Yes, this "Rueben" is trying to be less fearful. XOXO

  2. I love all of your pictures! Just beautiful! It is crazy where a whole year will take you. I was thinking about this over the weekend because it was my daughter’s birthday too. I kept looking back on the past year and all of the changes. The years seem to be going so fast and sometimes I get scared of what’s coming up next. All I know is I can’t wait to take my daughter to Disney. I think I’m going to freak out with excitement more than her. My poor husband!

    1. Happy Birthday to your little sweetie!! Yay, another Libra {secret Libra fist bump}.
      Oh Karen, I agree with you, where is the time going!!! I often wonder if my parents felt the same way when I was growing up: did they want to freeze time, turn back the hands, stop the clock, call a timeout, or film every second… to keep forever… I wonder.
      Since, the kids are all in school I swear time is zooming! Perhaps, it’s because *now* life is scheduled… stupid schedules…

      Disney will be amazing with your little, and I think I was the most excited! I totally cried. 😀

    1. Forever young, I wanna be forever young. Do you really want to live forever? Forever, forever… – Alphaville
      These lyrics.. came to mind when I read your comment and actually on birthday…
      I never thought I would have an issue with getting older, but boy was I wrong, turning 30 along with other life distractions caused me to hit my all time anxiety high.
      I’m hoping 40 will be a lot easier.

    1. It is, it’s seriously magical. We ended up walking alongside one of the light parades at night, and we LOVED it.
      I cannot wait for our next visit 🙂

    1. Thanks, Tricia. This move had me all sorts of excited, but once we got here, that’s when things started to sink in…
      However, it’s my mission to make South Carolina home while we’re here. Wish me luck!
      And you’re not a baby, moving is big, it’s a change, and change is big.

      I’m thinking I need to print your comment out and place it on my mirror “confidence and outlook on life” I need to remember those things… sometimes I lack the first one…. well a lot of times 🙂
      Thank you!

  3. Loved this! I turned 30 at the beginning of this year and I felt the same way you described. I felt panicked and old, like my “hey day” had come and gone, LOL. So dramatic. But like you I feel like my life just keeps getting so much happier and fuller and I’m so much more confident. It’s so crazy how much can change in a year, and I think it’s so cool/scary/exciting to move to a new state like you guys did. I hope you had a very happy birthday!

    1. Can I say I turned 30 at the beginning of this year too? I mean it would be a lie, it’s been a few but I just want to say 30 🙂
      It’s crazy how panicked you feel when you reach a certain age, that maybe.. when you were younger seemed old. When I was in my 20’s, 30’s didn’t seem old, I was actually excited to see how I would grow into 30’s.
      However, 30’s hit and the drama storm {parents’ divorce} all at once and boom! I imploded. I was an inward collapse of emotions and new anxieties…
      WHAT IF was the worst game I played.
      I hate the what if game, especially because I’m a Mommy to three lives; I never want “what if” to happen because I want to be around for every thing…
      Wow!! Shit just got real.. my bad.

  4. You and your umbrella are adorable! Change can suck and be rewarding at the same time. Sometimes it feels good to just scream and let it all out. I want a punching bag for a lot of reasons. I’m happy to hear that you feel like you’ve grown this year. Life’s pretty damn amazing!

    My birthday is this month, but I’ll forever be 23. I hope everyone is feeling better at your house and that you’re still celebrating this week. ♡

    1. Thanks for such a fun party, Jennifer <3
      The view was amazing, since we were tired on some nights we bring snacks to our room and watch the show there. Disney also has a water show with boats and lights, we could see that from our room too, it was amazing.

  5. I love this post. It is beautiful to see you step out of fear and really come into your own.

    It is amazing the twists and turns that come into our lives. The way things just change all of the sudden and then you’re on this unexpected trajectory of awesomeness :). I’m so happy for you and glad that you have found your voice and are brave enough to share it.


      1. Stupid panic! I didn’t think I had an issue, but ha ha ha boy was I wrong. I also had a WHOLE LOT going on back then; it added to my anxiousness. I’m happy to rid myself of that, sharing helps me in such a cleansing therapeutic way. I’m growing.
        All the best, always~

  6. Hi! I hope you had a great birthday. I hear south Carolina is a great place to live. We’ve had a similar year it seems. I guess I’m a kid at heart too because I’ve never forgotten my first visit to Disney World. It was magical! All the best to you my friend! 😀

    1. I had a great birthday thanks, Vashti. South Carolina has it’s pros and cons…
      Disney is magical, an experience never to be forgotten.
      Hopefully, you and I will have a magical year.

  7. Happy Birthday! I remember turning 30 and thinking that now I was finally an adult (haha, in some ways I’ll always be a kid). When I turned 40, a dear friend (about 7 years older than me) told me that the decade between 40 and 50 is the most growthful, soul-fulfilling, self-finding, decade of our lives. So far, that has been the case in my life. May this next year in your 30s be the very best yet! so much of life yet to live!

    1. Thanks, De! Isn’t if funny how you *think* you know who *you* are when you’re in your 20’s. I’m in my 30s and I have to say I’m becoming more aware of me, I’m loving it. I’m in no rush to join the 40’s club, but I’m looking forward to that journey. I imagine I’ll be even more aware, confident, and hopefully in the best shape ever 🙂 A girl can dream, right?
      Thanks for your kind comment– here’s to us and the future, we both have so much life to live.

  8. I enjoyed reading your post. As one who has been there 30’s, 40’s and now 50’s are all pretty wonderful. Enjoy them I can so relate to the moving. Our family will be moving to South Carolina from upstate New York. We are very excited. We have lived here all of our lives. We are thinking in June, so we have some time to prepare. We are planning to go to Disney World after our move. We haven’t been there since our honeymoon – almost 35 years ago.
    Happy almost Birthday.

  9. Hi! I found your post on the SITS girls link up. 🙂

    Moving is so not fun – I’ve done it more times than I can count. We will have been in this house for five years in January and that’s the longest I’ve lived anywhere. The experience definitely leaves it’s mark on you.

    I hope you had a great birthday!

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