Which do you prefer? |Racist| Words Matter| Real Talk |Blogging Controversial| Mrs. AOK, A Work In Progress
Awareness, NaBloPoMo

My Most Controversial Post #NaBloPoMo


Nov 17: What is the most controversial thing you’ve ever written on your blog? What compelled you to write it?

I never set out to be a controversial blogger, I’m usually NOT controversial.  However, there are times when I touch on things that seem to still, in 2014, create controversy such as race.  I’ve written a few posts on the issue of race, and each time those posts have garnered interest or debate.  I wrote about Miss America and Mrs. Deen, those two both created a small buzz, but it was my post I published this past Spring that created more of a debate. I welcome debate.

RACIST|Hate|Words Matter|Mrs. AOK, A Work In Progress

What was the post about?

Racism. I talked about an experience (month 4) here in South Carolina.  This wasn’t the first racist-type experience here in South Carolina, but it was the one that irked me enough to publicly rant about it.  What happened?  Someone said something to show their true colors, and it made me think– what do you prefer an open racist or closet racist?  The consensus was overwhelmingly OPEN RACIST, if you were wondering.

Why was I compelled to write that post?

I was done. I had heard enough, and I couldn’t keep quiet.  Why would I keep quiet? I feel when you stop speaking on issues that you care about, you’re not doing anyone a justice.  Why sweep hate or ignorance under the carpet?  I think we NEED to speak on these types of matters, can we talk them away, no.  However, maybe we can be an eyeopener to someone, hopefully.

© 2014, Dean @Mrs. AOK, A Work In Progress. All rights reserved.

18 thoughts on “My Most Controversial Post #NaBloPoMo”

  1. Just read your other two posts, and I’m glad you did it! I think a lot of people think racism has disappeared, and maybe as a society we have become less racist, but I also think it’s also become less PC to say racist things out loud and the racism is just now less overt. And I agree, I’d prefer to *know* that someone is racist.

    1. Thanks, Bev. Sometimes, I debate with myself: I’m unsure if I should touch on certain issues, what will people say, and I may lose readers. In the end if it’s something that is really bothering me, I have to let it out. I realize it may not be what people *want* to read, but it’s something I have to say.

    1. Exactly! I usually think long and hard before I post something I think may cause some sort of controversy, but in the end, if it’s truly bothering me, I post away.
      I’m glad you agree.

  2. Hmm.. I’d say an open racist too, although I prefer neither!
    I tell you – I live in a literal bubble in Northampton, MA. If my kid finds it weird that one of her best friends is black with two white dads.. yes… two dads.. white… she hasn’t let on.
    The world is not as kind, though. And I loved reading your old post. Sometimes things have to be said.

    1. I would prefer neither as well. I love your literal bubble!! That’s not really allowed here, well, legally. I think it’s rather lovely that your daughter doesn’t see a difference, it’s totally the norm for her <3 --I love it! Now, how do we package that and ship it all over the world?

  3. Your blog is a place for where you are allowed to write anything you want. People can also choose to read it or not. I am glad you wrote what you feel and what you want.

    Honestly, I would never write about such things because it doesn’t fall into my blog niche, however, it is good to every so often stir up a little controversy!

    1. Thank you!

      I totally struggle with “niche-ness” I have no idea what I classify myself as. If random is a niche, I’m there 🙂 However, I usually just say lifestyle, because this is my life, and that’s what I’m sharing.
      I like your niche, it’s yummy & funny!

  4. I think you should write about whatever the hell you please. I think being niche-less is freeing and rewarding. No one is coming to your site for something specific other than they like what you produce. Go on with your awesome self! xoxo

  5. I totally agree with you. Sweeping ignorance under the rug isn’t the way to banish it. The more it’s talked about, the more courage it gives others experiencing the same thing to speak out about it too. I’m glad you posted that piece and I don’t blame you either. My children are mixed and I’ve heard some real interesting things come out of the mouths from my southern family members.

    1. I’m sorry. Sometimes, I don’t understand why people don’t consider using their filters, or having one installed at all. It feels like an attack when it may not be one at all, but when you say something ignorant or blindly in regard to our mixed children, I want to get Mama Bear.
      I’m glad you agree, we need to face the tough issues.

  6. Good for you for speaking up! I write more about race & ethnicity on my blog than I ever intended. I have become more comfortable with the fact that just *bringing up* race is a problem for some people. In my opinion, if it makes you uncomfortable you have some self-examining to do. Nothing wrong with creating controversy if it’s done respectfully and without harm to others, which it seems like you did. 🙂

    1. Thanks, Keisha.
      I don’t know why people get uneasy it is somewhat mind boggling in 2014. I actually think one of the comments to me is that when you speak of race you divide… which is NO WAY what I’m trying to do, ever. Rather, my thought is to NOT divide us, because we’re all people.
      I haven’t blogged a ton about race, but I have blogged way more on this subject than I had ever intended.
      Thanks for the visit!

  7. I prefer neither. I first came here in 1989 from London, and have never up to this point seen or heard of racism. That summer I worked on a Summer Camp for children and adults that had mental disabilities, and across the water was a camp for survivors of the Holocaust.

    One day as part of the water staff we needed some large inner tubes for the kids to float on and Dee and I set off to town to purchase them. I am a five foot white girl from London and Dee was a six foot 4 inch black Thai kick boxing champion from the Bronx’s.

    We were ask to leave the first tow stores and the looks we were getting from the third scared Dee so bad we went back to camp. I kept asking him why the heck were we treated so badly. When we got back to camp he explained. I was dumbfounded. Who the heck in 1989 does that???? Well ups state NY did that. It was disgusting.

    Today I live in the midwest, and have friends of many different countries. Because the Hubs and I wanted it that way. We have traveled to many countries with the girls so that they know all that is out there. Out oldest is gay, and boy that has been challenging at times “For other people” She and we are lucky that our friends, where we live, and her school are amazing. She is hoping to go to college in San Francisco, hoping she will thrive there!!!! Hoping that she does not receive hate at college.
    Pisses me off that even today, there is hate out there, and good for you for standing up and speaking out about it!!!!!!

    1. Thank you, Ray, for sharing your story. I’m just terribly sorry that you had to ever endure seeing racism and of all places here in America. I love our country dearly, I bleed red, white, and blue, but… I hate that we are NOT a nation truly united.

      Dee did not deserve that kind of hate, no one does. I don’t understand WHY people feel that another person’s money isn’t good enough for them based on color… WTH? Most importantly why does skin color matter, we’re all freakin’ people! This makes me quite angry, can you tell? I’m editing myself of full blown foul mouth pirate rage right now… I had no idea upstate NY was like that.

      I’m happy that your daughter is able to be who she is where she is. I hope that one day it is excepted everywhere. Sadly, here not so much. I moved from Chicagoland, and I have to say, I was surprised in a delightfully good way, at all the melting of cultures and openness to gay rights there. I’m not sure if all of the Midwest or even all of IL is like that, but Chicagoland, for sure, is a great place to raise children to be open to culture and love. I wish your daughter all the best, and I’m proud of her. I know it can be tough, I cannot imagine how tough, but I know it is tough, to be young and out. My love to you and your family.
      Thanks for your heartfelt comment.

      1. We live in the Northern suburbs of Chicago, and I love the openness and welcome attitude of most people. I am grateful that we live here and she is able to be surrounded by acceptance.

        It sucks that you are where you are, and they still think that way. As you know we travel with the girls A LOT. We were in your neck of the woods several years ago and F, the oldest nearly got us kicked off of a Plantation. We were taking a tour and the lady stated that the slaves LOVED to work there. F at the age of 11 decided that she needed to be taught the truth in the history lesson that this lady was spewing to us. I was so proud of her, but nearly died as well. All F said was…. It had to be said correctly and she was not correct!!!!

        1. We use to live in the Western burbs. We loved it 🙂

          I’m glad your daughter spoke up, kudos to her! Some people really think it was a privilege to work on the plantations, I don’t know how or why, but, no. Many of the neighborhoods here are named something, something plantation. I’ve been told they’re “just” farms, and then I’m asked “what’s the big deal?” So, can F come and school them for me?

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